i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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