I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
