Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
