Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
