playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Randomize
