He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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