I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
