I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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