Fuck appropriateness.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize