porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
