You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize