The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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