what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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