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He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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