Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
