This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
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