idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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