Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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