I must be too annoying 4 u.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
