there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
420 ftw
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Randomize