I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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