I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
My brain says no but my pants say off.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
