It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
