he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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