did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize