Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize