it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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