it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Randomize
