btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
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