physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
they're like a gay fantastic four
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
