I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
