i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
