So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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