He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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