she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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