WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
