called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
