I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
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