is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize
