I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
