Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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