'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
