Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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