Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
