How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize