so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
