i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Sorry about my life...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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