It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
