Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Randomize
