i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
thus making me awesome and them whores
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
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